What do you want to know for? Oh, alright. I’m moving through my 80’s and trying something new. New for me. My current wife and I have escaped the winter snows and frigid temperatures of the great white northeast about 12 years ago, to bask in the warmth of the Sunshine State. Yup, we live in the middle of Florida in a place called The Villages… an alleged retirement community of about 150,000 residents, and supposedly the largest community of its type in the world. Close to 800 holes of golf, if you’re interested. I say alleged retirement community because about a fifth of the population is under 55 years of age… the cutoff date government bureaucrats determined is the minimum age to call yourself a retirement community. The Villages must maintain about 20% of their homes for people under 55, says the federal government. So, why are we here? Well, they offer free snow plowing and will even shovel your driveway, but of course there hasn’t been any snowfall in the twelve years we’ve lived here. In fact, the last time it snowed here was January 19, 1977, and I would guess it was all melted by about 10 AM.
The Villages is a great place to live. A guy named Peter Santenello has a 45 minute video about this place on his website, and calls it a “Disneyland for Adults.” I have never met him, but I have seen the video online, and it’s reasonably accurate. Fifty-seven square miles of land completely and beautifully landscaped, with good weather and sunshine throughout the year. And, no income tax in Florida. Did you know that?
OK, I’ve described the Geezer part, but what about Wheezy you ask? Well it all started roughly 80 years ago when I was diagnosed with asthma. That’s why I wheezed a lot, especially when out playing with other kids. Didn’t stop me from taking up smoking as a teenager. Didn’t tell my parents, but how could they miss it. I smelled like a dirty ashtray most of the time. Add to that multiple bouts of bronchitis and a few cases of pneumonia, and after about 40 years of a cigarette hanging out of the corner of my mouth, a lighted sign finally blinked on in my brain that said, “Quit Smoking Stupid,” or words to that effect. Today there are medications to keep your lungs free and clear most of the time, and I probably take the majority of them. But I still have occasional bouts of wheezing. So tennis, pickle ball, dragonboat racing and softball are out, but there is still plenty to do around here, one of which is what I am doing now.
You can probably contact me, if you want to, at: wheezygeezer86@gmail.com